Abbrev. Movie Reviews

Nicolas Cage is better with a beard.

The Saturday Night Strip Club #14 (Not Technically A Comic Strip)


I’ve been thinking a lot about comfort-watching (re-watching a favorite movie or show) and through rigorous speculation have determined that, despite access to a nearly infinite pool of content I’ve never seen, the likelihood that I will choose to comfort-watch on any given evening stands steadfast at about 20%.  image

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Blue Jasmine

Watching Cate Blanchett in Blue Jasmine is like watching a shred-metal guitarist sweep-picking 1000+ notes per minute.  It’s technically impressive for a song or two, but when you close your eyes it all sounds the same.

Be warned: this is the kind of movie that theater majors will fawn over, but regular audiences will sleep through.  

18 Years Since “Independence Day” Blew My Teenage Mind (And A Model Of The White House) To Pieces


Remember the first time Director Roland Emmerich leveled NYC? Who could forget the way the Empire State Building exploded from the top-down, blasting floor by floor in a chain reaction that expanded outwards until the whole city was flaming rubble.  This was pre-9/11 of course, back when that sort of imagery wasn’t loaded with actual memory and trauma.  For Emmerich, smashing national landmarks later became some sort of fetish - he went on to re-destroy the Big Apple in Godzilla, The Day After Tomorrow, and 2012.  But in 1996, the kind of destruction featured in Independence Day was unparalleled, and quickly ushered in the birth of cinematic “apoca-porn”.

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